Reading between the lines, I know he just wants to spend time with me.
Today is my friend Wesley's birthday. He was my childhood buddy and bandmate when we got a little bit older. We experienced many adventures between us and our third mate, the late, great Omeng. We seldom see or talk with each other right now. I miss him, and this is a tribute to my brother from another mother.
REACHING FRIENDS
I have a friend named Wesley. A good friend. He’s a musician, composer, and a free spirit. I treat him as badly as all of those I really care about. “All of those” is a bad choice of words, my friends these days are fewer than they’ve ever been. The trouble with friendship is that you have to put some work into it. I’m so busy putting work into work and church life that I neglect friends and suspend making decisions that might enable me to take care of both, better.
All week I’ve been talking about friendship and time. Relationships. On and on I’ve pondered about the lack and need of both. There has to be a better way of keeping in touch - without using the Internet or the highly-dependable cell phone - a better way of building relationships and expanding friendships. A real way of reaching out to friends.
Most of the time, we end up dead tired and ill-equipped to even deal with those already closest to us, consumed by so many self-serving and self-equipping activities eventually leaving us without time for its application. It also drains us physically, even depriving us of proper sleeping habits. How can you reach out effectively if, due to lack of sleep, smiling in itself takes energy and effort? Not all of us can live a normal day deficient of sleep, God created us all unique. The result? Fewer friends, fewer opportunities for having new and real ones. Fewer opportunities for sharing.
Some have a genius for friendship. It’s one thing to care and another to be capable of showing it. It is a talent I lack and because of it, one I’m sensitive about. Though I try, I’m long past the stages of apology. Anything I could say to those who needed me when I wasn’t there was too little, too late.
What brings all this up is a request from Wesley a while back for “jamming sessions.” Anybody who knows me knows I don’t smoke pot, but like all friends Wes and I have lots of codes and code words in our conversations. Wes was speaking about our making-music-and-creating-songs sessions. Wes is a fine music-maker and needs no help from me or anybody else so it’s become kind of a running gag between us. Reading between the lines, I know he just wants to spend time with me.
Oh, how I know I neglected these old friends for a long time now. I am sorry. I pray to God for miracles of finding pathways into old friends once again.
OLD FRIEND
All week I’ve been talking about friendship and time. Relationships. On and on I’ve pondered about the lack and need of both. There has to be a better way of keeping in touch - without using the Internet or the highly-dependable cell phone - a better way of building relationships and expanding friendships. A real way of reaching out to friends.
Most of the time, we end up dead tired and ill-equipped to even deal with those already closest to us, consumed by so many self-serving and self-equipping activities eventually leaving us without time for its application. It also drains us physically, even depriving us of proper sleeping habits. How can you reach out effectively if, due to lack of sleep, smiling in itself takes energy and effort? Not all of us can live a normal day deficient of sleep, God created us all unique. The result? Fewer friends, fewer opportunities for having new and real ones. Fewer opportunities for sharing.
Some have a genius for friendship. It’s one thing to care and another to be capable of showing it. It is a talent I lack and because of it, one I’m sensitive about. Though I try, I’m long past the stages of apology. Anything I could say to those who needed me when I wasn’t there was too little, too late.
What brings all this up is a request from Wesley a while back for “jamming sessions.” Anybody who knows me knows I don’t smoke pot, but like all friends Wes and I have lots of codes and code words in our conversations. Wes was speaking about our making-music-and-creating-songs sessions. Wes is a fine music-maker and needs no help from me or anybody else so it’s become kind of a running gag between us. Reading between the lines, I know he just wants to spend time with me.
Oh, how I know I neglected these old friends for a long time now. I am sorry. I pray to God for miracles of finding pathways into old friends once again.
- from "Coffee and Morning," 2010 essays
Raymund's Random Thoughts
You can widen your life by yourself, but to deepen it you need a friend.
If you have time to waste, waste it on a friend.
Be tender every time you bid your friends farewell, who knows if you will meet again.
Poem of the Week
OLD FRIEND
by Emon
Before the heart gets too tired
with its reminiscence,
too drained with its second thoughts
on vanished loves
that never were,
Before the heart gets too tired
with its reminiscence,
too drained with its second thoughts
on vanished loves
that never were,
I thought I’d send a note to you,
Old Friend,
old getting rusty with inattention.
How is it there
in heart and outside heart?
How does it continue beating
now that we are apart?
In here rain goes on pouring,
though the feeling is still dry.
Only some cavities are damp enough
to give me rest.
But even then moisture evaporates
as soon as it arrives.
The heart is burdened most
by sentiments come rushing.
It does not ponder so much about
what might have been
as it does about what was
but cannot be again.
Our friendship was and is, Old Friend.
It drives on despite my forced inattention.
(August 2000)
Old Friend,
old getting rusty with inattention.
How is it there
in heart and outside heart?
How does it continue beating
now that we are apart?
In here rain goes on pouring,
though the feeling is still dry.
Only some cavities are damp enough
to give me rest.
But even then moisture evaporates
as soon as it arrives.
The heart is burdened most
by sentiments come rushing.
It does not ponder so much about
what might have been
as it does about what was
but cannot be again.
Our friendship was and is, Old Friend.
It drives on despite my forced inattention.
(August 2000)
AND FINALLY
November is just around the corner. I hope you're sleeping warm amidst the cold. Take care.
Thanks for stopping by - see you next week.
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